"You’re pregnant with a baby you want and you and your husband planned for! Congrats! You must be thrilled! Everyone else is! Don’t you love being pregnant? Everyone else does! It’s magical! It’s wonderful!"

Skepchick » What pregnant women won’t tell you. Ever.

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via greenupgrader.com

via greenupgrader.com

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If you’re not familiar with Mitch, you should be.

mitch hedberg and the ducks (via peacheypt)

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Sumerians Look On In Confusion As God Creates World

“I do not understand,” reads an ancient line of pictographs depicting the sun, the moon, water, and a Sumerian who appears to be scratching his head. “A booming voice is saying, ‘Let there be light,’ but there is already light. It is saying, ‘Let the earth bring forth grass,’ but I am already standing on grass.”

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ROOMMATES - Episode 1 (via thebighonkin)

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